The last 2 and a half months have been really insane. They’ve gone so fast but at the same time they feel like a year has gone by, just so much has happened for me personally.
I don’t think I ever expected to find myself writing about anything at any stage other than academically (fucking college) and to be doing it on a weekly basis now is pretty cool. The comments people give you also makes you feel nice and fluffy, like a cloud full of rain but it doesn’t rain it just floats around all white (supremacy booo) and makes everyone happy.
I’m also recording a podcast tomorrow after I did one last week with this huge show (ran by the guys I write with), and someone has asked me to be the editor of their website, it’s just crazy. Like, how has all this happened so fast, it’s a bit mental…
There’s one thing I’m starting to find though, and it’s like my online persona is so different to who I am in my day-to-day life… Like, I don’t talk as much about football (obvz cuz none of you like it), I’m not as outspoken about shit that really matters in the world, and I don’t have the confidence I feel looking at 140 characters and a blank text box.
Is this good? Bad? It feels like something we talk about in Cultural Identities, but fuck that bitch.
Whatever it is, I’m starting to find that I’m slowly becoming overly immersed in this Twitter persona that I’m creating, but now it’s spreading to these pods and shit, like… What is going on?
Tbh though, I kind of like who I make myself to be. It’s like the person that you always wished you could be. I feel a lot more confident in myself in the character that RyanMcTrippy kind of is, because it isn’t exactly real life is it. It’s coding, it’s just letters that I hit and it pops up to a few hundred people to read.
That’s another thing, people are starting to look forward to what I have to say about things. They’re like “i look forward to your next piece” and you’re like are you serious?
I got an email of the guy who runs the podcast from some man who asked him to send on this little message of how a speech I gave was really awesome and I spoke above my age and all this really nice stuff, it’s so odd yet warming to know that people from across the world
are hearing your thoughts, agreeing with them, and taking the time to seek out and tell you how that made them feel.
It finally feels like my life has some direction, or like this will all go towards something maybe. I don’t know, it might just be a pointless hobby, who can tell me the straight answer
Maybe this is all just a big waste of time, or maybe it isn’t? Maybe I’m finally good at something, maybe I’m not?
Maybe this online persona I fel like I’ve developed will seep into my own life, and the person that I am to all of you. not like, abrupt sentences with hashtags or repeated ramblings about sports, but maybe confidence and belief in myself. That’d be nice.
P.s. fuck college but I need an intervention to get my life back on track with all of that :(
P.s.s the title is Hot Property because right now that’s what I am motherfucker.
P.s.s.s I love you all dearly and my internet friends could never replace the love and happiness you guys bring to me everyday.
Except you Luke Gleeson, with your fucking Fruit & Nut chocolate bar you sick fuck. (not really you’re deadly)